Account Cancelation Saga–some progress, at least

As of last night, the tracking number on my certified, Priority Mail letter still came up saying, “Your item was accepted at 4:27 PM on February 23, 2010 in PEPPERELL, MA 01463.” This could mean that the letter never left the Pepperell post office at all (which happened with the Priority Mail ARCs of Mortal Touch in 2007), or that they got hung up in Leominster. I’d have thought it would say “delivery attempted” if the latter was the case, since I paid extra for delivery confirmation, but maybe not.

With my disrupted night and all the clocks being off, I woke up at 11:50 a.m. and decided to get up and call Net1plus and see if I could get through to Ms. Billing Dept “nine-to-noon” before she left for the day and her weekend. Every time I’ve called up to now, I’ve had to leave a voice mail message, but this time, I waited on hold briefly and then Ms. Billing Dept answered.

I was too groggy and gravel-voiced to sound aggressive or feisty. But Ms. Billing Dept knew who I was, because when I said my name and said, “I’ve been trying to get hold of you…” she bristled and said defensively, “I’ve called back and left a message every time you’ve called…”

Well…she didn’t do that after my call on Tuesday when I talked to Rick in Tech Support (which I did in accordance with Ms. Billing Dept’s explicit instructions!). And that doesn’t help with the essential issue, which is my difficulty in calling during the tiny window of time when she’s available. But, please. If you’re a small business and you have an unhappy customer, there are two ways you can react: you can be apologetic and accommodating, or you can get all defensive. Guess which one will keep you in business and which one won’t.

I explained that I wanted to cancel my account, adding that I wanted to make sure that automatic billing to my credit card was also canceled. Ms. Billing Dept said she was doing that, but she asked why I was canceling. I said I was changing my service provider. Then she wanted to know whether I was changing to DSL or cable! It’s none of their fucking business! I hesitated and she hastily mumbled, “it’s for our records.” So I said DSL. I repeated a couple of times that I wanted everything canceled (i.e. not just hosting, or not just high-speed Internet, because I don’t want to be stuck still signed up for the basic account).

I had to ask for the supposedly all-important Cancelation Code, which supposedly I must have in order to verify that I requested cancelation. But the effective cancelation date is March 17, so at least they’re not holding me to (and billing me for) the entire 30-day-notice period.

I asked Ms. Billing Dept if she’d gotten a letter from me. She said she hadn’t. I asked if there was anyone in the office when the mail was delivered, and she said yes, in fact, she’d just gotten today’s mail a few minutes ago.

She said that I had to ship back “the equipment,” meaning the modem. I said I knew that, but I wasn’t sure where to send it, since she hadn’t gotten the Priority Mail letter I’d just sent. Ms. Billing Dept said if I didn’t send back the equipment, “it’s a $125 charge.” Well, excuse me…I didn’t say I wouldn’t send it back, did I? And $125 for this obsolete little piece of shit? That’s at least three times the replacement cost! It’s about four years old at this point. I asked what address to send it to and Ms. Billing Dept said, the same one on their website.

Anyway, I got off the phone with that feeling of mingled humiliation and violation that you feel when you knuckle under to a bully–an experience I enjoyed pretty much on a daily basis in grades 1 through 9 when I was a kid, so I’m very familiar with it. Now I’m trying to decide on the best way to pack up and return the modem to make sure it gets there. Whatever I use, I’m going to insure it for $125, just in case!

I got an appointment for a hair cut, which I haven’t done for six weeks, and went out for that. Then I went to the post office to get the mail and try and find out what happened to the fucking certified Priority Mail letter that I spent $10 to send, for nothing.

The Pepperell postal clerk was confounded. But, she said, what happens when these are delivered is that the mail carrier makes one attempt, and if no one is available to sign for the letter, they leave a notice that the letter is being held at the post office. They don’t make a second attempt, they hold it for five days. After that, I think it’s returned to the sender as refused.

So much for Certified Mail! You think Ms. Billing Dept is going to go all the way out to the post office to pick up a piece of mail?? Not bloody likely! I should have just sent the letter in a plain envelope with a 44 cent stamp, saved myself $9.56! What a joke!

The Pepperell postal clerk said that she’d have the Pepperell Postmistress call over to the Leominster post office and see what happened to my letter. She took my phone number–I gave her my business card, too–and said she’d have the Postmistress call me. “She’ll be back in half an hour, an hour at most,” she promised. Yeah, well, I didn’t really expect that the Postmistress was going to call me, hahahaha. And I was right, she didn’t. But I didn’t make other calls this afternoon because I was hoping she might–and now it’s the weekend and I have to wait until Monday to do more follow-up.

This whole thing is really leaving a bad taste in my mouth. I’ve always gone out of my way (and willingly paid a bit more) to support small local businesses. I’ve never been treated this shabbily in return for my efforts.